Spring 2023 has sprung in Broken Arrow, OK

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

A Bittersweet Day


Yesterday my wife and I visited my folks.  During that time I spent a few hours trimming their roses in the front yard and cleaning up the flower beds that line one side of their long driveway.  It had probably been a month since I had last done some work in their front yard.  I had been focusing my attention to the needs in the backyard and the roses in front, although loaded with a gorgeous array of blooms, were beginning to look out of control!

It was a bittersweet process as this will most likely be the last time that I attend to their roses before my folks move out of the house at the end of the month.  The decline in both of my parent’s health over the last six months, that eventually led to the need for a 24 hour care assistant for my Dad and the necessity of the move to an assisted living community, has been difficult for me to observe.  When added to my wife’s situation… well, let’s just say that these last months have been a little taxing on my physical and emotional well being.

My folks and especially my Mom have been my greatest advocates ever since my wife and I returned to California in 2009.  They have supported and encouraged me in all the tough decisions that I have had to make.  My Mom seems to be one of only a few family members and friends who understand the delicate balance between the faith walk we have undertaken and the physical realities that we deal with on a daily basis.  She is and has always been a strong and practicing Catholic, and while she may have only a minimal understanding of the Bible, she does know the Lord and retains a deep and intimate prayer life with Him. 

She is in complete agreement with us as to my wife’s total and complete healing, but is also sympathetic and proactive to both the physical needs and the emotional strain that I deal with.  To be perfectly honest, I believe that even though she is dealing with her own challenges, that she is the only local individual who regularly inquires as to my wife’s well being and asks “What can we do to help?”  I am assured that all of our Christian friends and acquaintances are also in agreement with our stand of faith and they regularly encourage us from the Word.  What I have come to see though, is that many will tend to shy away from the physical side of the situation.  I am not sure if it because they feel like any attention given to the natural problems might destroy our faith, or that they just aren’t comfortable dealing with the affects of the disease itself. 

One of the many hard lessons I have learned through our hands on experience in this journey has been the reality that a family dealing with a life threatening situation needs to have both sides of the coin ministered to.  Yes, first and foremost we must know our position in Christ and receive, build ourselves up in and stand on the promises of healing that the Lord Jesus Christ has provided for us (See: I Peter 2:24 for example).  But while standing, one still has to deal with the physical requirements of the afflicted individual, the long days and sleepless nights, the medical, household, personal and emotional requirements that must be met, along with all the outside pressures that unknowing people put on you.

Like I said, my Mom has been that giving and understanding individual to under gird and support my wife and I during this time in our lives.  I thought of all this as we backed out of their driveway and into the street yesterday.  While I shifted the transmission into drive I glanced at my Mom standing in the driveway waving good-by to us and sadly realized that things would never be the same again once they moved.  Life was changing we must change along with it.  Then as we waved back to her I saw the freshly trimmed roses and raked flowerbeds on our right, my Mom in the middle and the beautiful extent of their park-like front yard to her left.  It was like I was looking at the past, present and the future.  The trimmed and orderly beds lining the driveway symbolizing the completed past, my Mom in the present and the well planned landscape in the main part of their front yard that still needs some trimming as her future. 

I was reminded of Hebrews 13:8 where the writer declares that “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever.” (NKJV)  The same God that has cared for and provided all the miraculous deeds for my family in the past, is right in the middle of what is happening today.  And while the future may be unknown, we can rest assured that the hand of the master gardener, who has skillfully planned the landscape of our lives, will continue to tend to our tomorrows in like manner as He has in the past.

Keep that in mind as you face the changes that occur in your life.  For what He is doing for us, He will also do for you!  Someone has said that “the only thing that is constant in life is change!”  It is inevitable, but we don’t have to be afraid when it comes.  Expect it, embrace it and trust the Lord in the midst of it!  It’s all part of the “peace of God that surpasses all understanding” that “will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.”  (Philippians 4:7 NKJV)  Have a great day.  Stay in tune to His Word and keep asking yourself… “What am I expecting today?”

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