In Retrospect...

As I sat down in front of my computer in the study early this morning, I stared in a daze right through the monitor and into my innermost thoughts.  Today I turned the big 6-0.  All kinds of thoughts were drifting through my mind.  Am I old now?  What do I have to show for this milestone in my life.  What does my future hold?

In many respects, my life has been circling in a holding pattern since we decided to return to our hometown after the completion of Bible School almost five years ago.  My lifelong goal of starting a church and diving head first into full-time ministry was wisely set aside as the needs of my wonderful wife’s health took top priority. 

That fateful step turned our lives inside out.  It is like everything changed.  Many whom I thought would rally alongside us in the tough decisions that followed didn’t.  In fact, some very close to us actually came against us when we needed them the most.  Talk about having your world go into a tailspin!  Ideologies and theology that I held onto for most of my adult life came into question.  I even began to see falsities and discrepancies in the way that I ministered to those in the various congregations that I served in over the past 25 years.  Suddenly I rudely discovered what it meant to be on the other side of the desk when assistance and personal ministry was required.

So I found myself sitting in the stillness of the new day this morning having almost reached the point of receiving social security, having gone through the exercise of examining just about everything that I took for granted in my life and in some respects wondering why!  Then I broke away from my thoughts and began to read Paul’s words to his friends in the church at Philippi.

Here we find a man who had lived at the pinnacle of Christian ministry.  He had traveled much of the known world and ministered to probably thousands of individuals.  He had faced the leaders of the religious groups, city governments and representatives of Caesar himself.  Then he suddenly found himself in Rome under house arrest and chained to a guard 24/7.  In the natural it looked like everything was over.  His glorious past but a puff of smoke and his future looking a little bleak.   But the interesting point is that Paul’s attitude was not one of “poor me” but of “celebration!”

In Philippians 1:18-19 he declares that “I’m going to keep that celebration going because I know how it’s going to turn out.” (The Message Bible)  In the next verse he talks of his “earnest expectation” (NKJV) that in nothing will he be ashamed, but will continue in all boldness or confidence that everything was going to turn out for the glory of God.  He was not going to allow the circumstances that surrounded him to dictate contrary to what he know was God’s positive conclusion to the event his was currently experiencing.  Paul was a man that chose to live his daily life to the fullest extent possible.  He took advantage of every opportunity and was assured that everything would work out!

When I finished reading and contemplating that small section of scripture, I discovered that any personal hesitation about the next 60 years of my life had totally disappeared!  I read in another blog where the 60 year old writer stated that they were just reaching a stride in their lives!  And you know what?  That’s exactly how I feel.  I can look back and see with great satisfaction all the wonderful things that have been accomplished individually, as a member of a strong husband and wife team, and as a family unit and rest comfortably.  But it is far from over!  There are just way too many good things ahead to look forward to.

Yes, we’ve been through a lot, but we’ve learned and grown even more through it all!  In some respects you could say that I am now a seasoned veteran.   Maybe I don’t have all the vim and vigor that I did ten or twenty years ago, but I now have the wisdom, experience and battle tested love of God that gives me a bold and bright view of the years ahead.  I am excited about life.  How about you?  Age really doesn’t have much to do with your personal outlook.  What matters is how or through WHO’s eyes do you look at your future.

Paul kept his eyes squarely pegged on his heavenly Father and he lived a full and prosperous life that touched the heart of thousands in his time and continues to influence millions today!  I want to continue to live my life to the fullest just as Paul did his.  So when you come right down to it… I guess that I am proud to say that I have come to the sixtieth year of my young life.  The last few years have definitely made their mark, but it is but a drop in the bucket compared to the great times ahead.  Isn’t God good!  Have a great day.  Stay in tune to His Word, and keep asking yourself… “What GOOD THINGS am I expecting today?”