"Man Up!" - Differing Standards

As I sat at my desk in the quiet of the morning while the freezing rain was coating everything outside with a thin layer of white, I found myself thinking about an incident that happened when Piper and I were juniors in High School.  We were both part of a large group of friends that enjoyed doing things together after school and on weekends.  This particular time we had gathered in one of the hallways of Montgomery High in Santa Rosa, California and were planning a trip to the coast for the upcoming weekend.

What initially popped up in my remembrance this morning, was the gleam in her eyes and the sense of adventure that I noticed in Piper that day.  I realized that even way back then… a good year before we would become more than just friends and actually start dating, that we were unknowingly working together as a leadership team in the planning of that and many of the other activities our group pursued together.  

As I recall that day in the hallway, we were trying to figure out how we could carpool together when Piper immediately jumped into the fray and excitedly suggested that she could take her Dad’s truck and that we could all ride in the open bed for the forty-five minute ride to the beach… and while everyone tended to like the idea, I remember declaring that it might not be the safest thing to do and most likely wasn’t even legal!  That’s a little weird thinking back now, that I was the voice of reason…

At the beginning of the next school year when we started dating, we almost immediately stepped into leadership roles in her church’s youth group along with some all-school events.  From that point on we just sort of never looked back and tended to continue in that role in numerous new, adventurous and sometimes a bit outrageous events as leaders in the churches we served in and with our family. I use the term outrageous not because that’s how we thought about them, but how some others around us who had differing outlooks than us did.

Ephesians 4:1 in The Message Bible encourages us “to get out there and walk – better yet run – on the road that God called you to travel.”  And I must admit that up until recently with the situation with Piper’s health… but yet even then…(as we did move across the country following His call for us didn’t we?), I don’t think we hardly ever broke our stride in pursuing the things we felt Papa God was calling us to experience.  The Good News Bible definitely caught my attention with its translation of that same verse as it states: “… live a life that measures up to the STANDARD God set when he called you.”

The command to live up to the STANDARD THAT GOD SET FOR US was a bit of a game changer in how I now see my own life and helped to correct the way I have look at others who do not have the same calling as Piper and I.

I have known for some time that we were called to be “pioneers” throughout our lives.  We were part of and/or helped to initiate and grow the last five start-up churches we served in, were pioneers in homeshooling back in the early 1980’s, ventured into numerous home businesses over the years and have lived in twelve different homes in three different states over the forty years of our marriage… and each time getting a itching and yearning for new adventures and challenges within a few years of living there!  

Now some folks would look at that on our resume and simply think that we were pretty flaky!  But we are pioneers… and when you look at it from that point of view you would understand and see that we have just been very active in pursuing the various positions and kingdom responsibilities that Papa God has entrusted to us.

When I read about living up to the STANDARDS of our particular calling, I suddenly understood that each calling of God comes with a different set of STANDARDS that those called to it must follow in their lives.  As pioneers we tend to be more free and able to follow our God given dreams and make decisions and take actions that others may consider to be fool-hardy or risky.

On the other hand, we have many friends and family members that are called to be “settlers.”  Please don’t confuse the term “settlers” with the funny Directv ad that talks about those who “settle” for less with their TV carrier selections.  The “settlers” that I am talking about are those who are called to become established in a certain geographical area and develop and grow their lives, their ministries and their God given and anointed influence right there.

It makes sense that the STANDARDS of behavior (See the 1965 Bible in Basic English’s translation of Ephesians 4:1) for this calling would be different from the pioneers who are called to go out and open up new lands for the settlers to come and establish.

This truth has helped me to understand why those with different callings than us would question our actions.  It has also opened my eyes to see how I have judged those with differing callings wrongly as I was viewing them through my calling’s set of STANDARDS… not the ones that they are rightfully following!

So… what do you think about that?  Does that make any sense and possibly clear up some things for you?  It sure did for me!  Have a great week.  Keep pursing the callings that God has called YOU to and at that same time keep asking yourself… “What STANDARDS am I expecting to live today?”

"Man Up!" - Acceptance of Others

I have found myself getting a little anxious at times when I look at the weekly weather forecast.  One thing that is hard to change is my love for my hometown’s West Coast weather!  The occasional snow and ice out here have been difficult for me to adjust to.  When I see the small symbols for snow and ice on my weather apps, I tend to give an audible sigh!  But I finally had the revelation after the last snow and ice storm that if God sent us here… which I firmly believe He did… then I should be excited about the idea of four distinct seasons and should look forward to the fun adventures ahead and EXPECT to enjoy them because – He will take care of us through any weather, hot and humid or snowy and cold… as well as with the lovely spring and fall seasons where it is more like our summers back home!  

So, with that in mind, I have recently come to ACCEPT our weather patterns for what they are and have made the choice to rejoice and make the most of them.  And you know… since I made that decision, I have found myself to be more at peace, more adventurous during the changes in the weather and actually enjoying it!  Today’s forecast has the potential for snow and I am looking forward to frolicking in the white powder (if any actually sticks) with our dog who absolutely can’t get enough of the stuff!

And speaking of the need to ACCEPT things… that same thought came to mind as I continued to study from the beginning of Ephesians chapter four this morning.  Verse two in my favorite God’s Word © translation says: “Be humble and gentle in every way.  Be patient with each other and lovingly ACCEPT each other.”  The word “ACCEPT” definitely caught my attention as it cast a different spin on how I understood that verse.  Most other translations use words and phrases like “forbearing one another,” “putting up with,” or “enduring one another.” 

I especially have enjoyed and employed the technique of “putting up with” those who have said and done things that are less than encouraging to my wife and I over the last few years.  But the thought of “ACCEPTING” them kind of threw a wrench into my theology!  When I first read that translation this morning my mind immediately enhanced the verse by adding to my theology buster... "Just as they are!”

That quickly brought me back to the realization that the ones I had been just “putting up with” were really just responding to us in the same way they usually had in the past.  They have tended to be the “spoilers” for many of the major faith decisions we had made over the years… or you could say they played the role of the “devil’s advocate.”  The big difference between then and now was the intricate role that my wife always played as the middleman (or woman in this case!) between them and our family.  

She’s always had the ability to bring peace and understanding into most situations with a well-placed dash of joy and humor… at least she did for me!  She could explain the others totally different point of view, which was partially based on their life’s experiences, personality types and faith EXPECTATIONS, in such a way that it helped me to see the “why’s” of their responses, take their ultimate concerns into consideration and in the meantime… help me to cool down!

This time around I (actually both parties…) did not have her available to play that pivotal role and I think that it caused both sides to over-react.  As I looked back this morning with the thought of “ACCEPTING” them for who they are, I was able to see things in a different light.  It has helped me to understand where they may have been coming from, and even though I still disagree with their reasoning, words and actions, I have a greater peace because underneath it all I realize that they believed they were actually trying to help me.

My serendipitous moment in the solitude of our new study earlier today, has given me the ability to better reach out to them and “Through the peace that ties us together, do MY best to maintain the unity that the Spirit gives,” as verse three encourages us. (God’s Word © personalized)

My job is not to try and change them, or constantly feel like I have to prove myself and my actions – like I have felt for most of my married life!  My job is to walk in Christian love for as the Popular Commentary on the New Testament states concerning Ephesians 4:2, “without the Christian grace of love it (forbearance, putting up with, or simply ACCEPTING them) degenerates into indifference.”

So I am choosing to ACCEPT those whose opinions may differ from mine for who they are, with a mind toward their individual backgrounds, life experiences, Biblical understandings, where they live and/or their world view of things.  My understanding is that Godly love always EXPECTS the best in others, so I am choosing to look for the good intended or behind their words and/or actions. 

 And I also realize and keep foremost in my vision that I am confident in my relationship and communion with Papa God and will never allow another person’s disagreement to steal, shake or upend my EXPECTATIONS, for my faith assures me of the things that I am EXPECTING and it convinces me of the things I am believing for that I cannot yet see!”  (See Hebrews 11:1 in the God’s Word © translation.) 

Well, the weekend is upon us!  My EXPECTATIONS are that you and I are going to have a great weekend… and as you do, keep asking yourself… “Who am I going to ACCEPT… for who they are… today?”

"Man Up!" - Toe Grips...

I kind of felt like we were simple country folks yesterday as we loaded up the car and headed out to go to the city!  Our Australian Shepherd had an appointment for a checkup at the Vet right behind the apartment community where we used to live in the Morrisville/Cary area about 45 minutes northeast from our home.  While the Vet was checking the pooch out, I mentioned to her that Mandie has been doing well since our last visit except that she has been slipping, sliding and sometimes spilling on the hardwood floors throughout our new home.  

Without missing a beat the Doctor proceeded to hand me a brochure describing a new product called ToeGrips that are designed for older dogs (and those with other difficulties) whose legs aren’t as strong as they used to be.  The tiny rubber-like grips fit right on the dog’s nails and are not normally felt by the dog.  Then they act, as the product is named, as small gripping points of contact to the floor giving the dog a more sure balance with each step they take.  

Well, that seemed like the perfect solution to Mandie’s needs and we had the Vet fit her with a set!  I had noticed the other day that the dog was slipping and sometimes completely losing her footing when she jumped down from the one chair we let her lay on in the living room, so I taped a rug to the floor in front of the chair to give her the firm contact she needed.  But she was still having some difficulties around the rest of the house, therefore the ToeGrips look to be the right fit for her… and so far they seem to be working!  She did lick at them a little at first, but now seems comfortable with her cool new foot attire.

It would really kind of hurt me when I would observe our beloved canine family member slip and fall.  She would get this look of utter embarrassment on her face and I would run to assist and gently help her up while encouraging her that all was fine.  It’s almost the same feelings as when I see Piper slip as she has battled the Alzheimer’s.  I think these occasions are reminders to me of the times I have slipped and fallen in my daily walk as a Christian and/or with others around me.  Have you ever been there before… slightly angry at yourself and embarrassed at the same time?

I know that I have mentioned (probably a zillion times) of some of the outrageous and mostly miss-informed persecution aimed at me during the first few years of the attack on my wife’s health.  At times it felt like I was an open sore with someone pouring salt into it!  But I think even worse, was the way I felt about myself when I finally came to my senses and realized how badly I… a man in the pastoral ministry for over thirty years, as some would call a professional Christian… was handling the situation!

Then I also look back at the times I said or more often thought things I never should have even considered, or the times I said I would do something and I didn’t because I thought what I was doing was more important than keeping my word to someone else.  And then there’s the times… well, my list could go on and on!

This morning as I read Ephesians 4:2 from the 1965 Bible in Basic English, I found myself laughing in dis-belief as I read: “With all gentle and quiet behavior, taking whatever comes, putting up with one another in love; taking care to keep the harmony of the Spirit in the yoke of peace.”  One of my commentaries had a footnote on the word “love” which sent me over to I Corinthians 13:4-5 and I almost fell out of my chair while laughing even harder as I absorbed what the Bible says about love being patient and kind, not jealous, not singing its own praises, not arrogant, nor rude or thinking too highly of oneself, or being irritable or keeping track of wrongs.  Those definitions are everything that I WASN”T when I came under attack or did something stupid!

Then it suddenly came to me that I needed something like Mandie’s ToeGrips to keep me from slipping when I am pressured to act in a way that is unbecoming of a follower of Jesus Christ.  But while I am not planning on having the Vet put some ToeGrips on my toes (I’ve never really liked going barefoot anyway!), I am planning on staying focused on God’s love to help me stand firm and upright when I might get a little weak kneed due to the negative comments of others or when I am tempted to not do the right thing in order to get out of a sticky or uncomfortable situation.

When you study it out you’ll see that this is the solution that Paul gave us in Ephesians 4:2.  I like that translation of the verse in the way it bluntly tells us to put up with others… in love.  In case you didn’t figure it out, the word love here is describing the Agape, God kind of love… not love that comes from our feelings or our thoughts or that comes from our human response to a situation.  Paul told us a few verses previous to this statement in Ephesians 3:19 that Christ’s love “goes far beyond any (natural) knowledge.”  (God’s Word ©)  The Message Bible calls it “the extravagant dimensions of Christ’s love.”

It is the kind of love that is not influenced by natural emotions or dependent on outside stimuli!  It is just the kind of product we Christians need to keep us from slipping, sliding and occasionally spilling on the hard, slick things that we face on a daily basis in our individual worlds.  So where am I going with this?  Well that’s easy… Be like Mandie and Don’t Slip, but Keep Your Grip… on God’s love and thereby doing what is right in His eyes!

Have a great day today and keep asking yourself… “How am I expecting to keep my GRIP today?”

"Man Up!" - Be YOU

As I sat at my laptop ordering some blinds for our bathroom window yesterday, I suddenly paused and looked around the dining and living room areas of our new home.  It dawned on me as I was trying to choose the right color for the blinds that when I look around me, I see a lot that looks like Piper and me!  That is probably not a great revelation to many of you, but at that moment it was a big deal to me.

I think the cheap plastic blinds that were on the master bathroom window were one of the only items not upgraded in our home when we moved in.  The very first time I attempted to raise them up, the cord on the lift pull disintegrated and the blinds fell off to one side in a tangled mess!  At that time I hung a towel on the window and tended to forget all about it until yesterday when I set out to take care of the need.  My revelation mentioned above arose when I couldn’t decide between the dark red or hunter green colors.

I found myself leaning to the red because I thought that most people would think it went better with the colors of the floor and tile in the bath as well as with the accents in our bedroom.  The indecision came though, because I REALLY liked the green better.  I finally came to my senses when I figured out that I was the one who had to look at them every day, and that it really didn’t matter what others may think… besides who would come into our master bath except for my wife and I! (and the green would also go nicely with the brown/gold floors and tile…)  So, with a quick click of the mouse, I highlighted the green blinds on the webpage and clicked the submit button!

This morning as I was reading at the beginning of Ephesians chapter four I got as far as the first two verses and couldn’t go on.  A portion of Ephesians 4:1 in the Moffatt translation jumped out at me as I read “…live a life worthy of your calling…”  As I meditated on it, my revelation from yesterday came into a clearer focus as I heard that voice deep in me repeat the words “YOUR calling” over and over again.  It then dawned on me that much of our individual callings are based on who we are. 

As I think about Christians that I hold in high esteem, I realized that a big part of their success in my eyes is due, in part, to the way they incorporate who they are into their daily lives.  Their personalities, their personal strengths and weaknesses, their preferences in the styles they choose in their dress, the type of cars they drive, the houses they live in and the way they decorate them all blend into the Christian walk they project to the world.  I think God looks at all of that in each of us when He chooses our individual callings… for it is who we are!

While continuing to digest that translation’s meaning, I immediately saw a footnote in my mind’s eye that highlighted the thought: “MY calling… NOT someone else’s!”  And as I recalled some of the troubling directions given to us at the beginning of the journey we are on with my wife’s health, I understood Paul to be saying that we are to live our lives in the ways that God made US and not try to or allow ourselves to be forced to live our lives someone else’s way!

It came to me back then that these well-meaning (I hope) folks took no consideration of who we really are, for their strong “suggestions” would have made things quite difficult and unbearable for us.  They responded to us from who they are and not from the outlook of who we are… does that make sense to you?  For instance, my wife and I are not the mini-van type of people, we are more the Mustang type!  Nothing wrong with mini-vans but they are not for us!  My wife would have no part of them when our kids were young.  She wanted a Suburban with big tires and mag wheels… and I had my Camaro!

So what’s my point?  It’s simply this: Know who you are.  Look at the whole picture of the gifts and talents that Papa God has endowed you with and live your life accordingly.  I find that life is a lot more enjoyable and profitable as well to His kingdom purposes for us when we follow our road and not try to be like anyone else!  God made you and me special, so why not live your life to the fullest extent within in the boundless parameters of who He made you to be?  He put all that in you for a purpose you know, so be you in Him to the world.  Have a great week, and keep asking yourself… “Whose life am I expecting to live today?”

"Man Up!" - Authoritative Faith

When I took a final peek at the weather forecast last night before retiring for evening, the weather app on my phone was predicting a 40% to 60% chance for light snow in the early hours of the next day ending around 9:00 AM.  But alas, when I pulled open the curtains a little past 7:30 this morning, I was greeted by a green expanse of lawn and trees with what looked like the brightest red Cardinal I’d ever seen on a perch near our play structure as the sun was just beginning to slip through the light cloud cover.

Now, don’t get me wrong… I enjoy an occasional light dusting of snow, but after the snow and ice storm we endured a few weeks back, I would much rather wake up to sunny skies, the luxurious green that seems to encapsulate our property, and the beauty of God’s wildlife living in the nearby woods.  Did I mention that I was greeted earlier this week when I opened the dining room curtains by a big friendly looking gray squirrel who was foraging around our deck?  You sure don’t see them that big or that healthy back where I come from!  This guy reminded me of the one’s we’d see high up in the Sierras in northeastern California.

The sun that replaced the prediction of snow this morning is similar to how we should believe our bold, confident and authoritative acts of faith to work.  Hebrews 11:1 in the God’s Word © translation informs us that “Faith assures us of the things we expect and convinces us of the existence of things we cannot (yet) see.”  When I went to bed last night I was believing that Papa God would make a way for us to be able to drive into town today so I could get some needed supplies from The Home Depot.  If it had snowed I most likely would not be able to make the trip as it is difficult to maneuver my wife’s transport chair in the snow!  So, when I leaned over and turned off the light on the bed stand, I was expecting to see the sun, dry streets and warm enough temperatures to comfortably take my wife outside.

My expectancy in God, His Word and His answers to my prayerful requests gave me an authoritative attitude concerning what I would see in the morning… and that’s exactly what I saw!  But when I looked out the window did I puff up my chest and strut around the house as if I did something great?  Not on your life!  If the dog could attest to it (as she was the only one in the front room of the house with me at the time…) she would tell you that I praised the Lord and thanked Him for His faithfulness!

I believe that Papa God not only wants us to pray authoritatively like we discussed in our last post, but that He also wants us to have a faith in Him that is demonstrated by authoritative actions based on the Word that we are standing on.  I guess you could call it Authoritative Faith!  The so called roll call of faith in Hebrews chapter eleven tells us that faith assures, faith expects, faith convinces, faith leads, faith enables and faith conquers.  It also declares that Papa God accepts our faith and the consequent actions we take based on our unswerving faith in Him and His Word… AND I have come to personally experience that He does this even if we blow it somewhere along the way!

I believe that this is the reason my wife and I have always ended up on our feet even when we (read that: “I”) have made some stupid mistakes in the process.  We have always tried to learn from our mistakes by asking for forgiveness and then wisdom on how to not do the same thing again, and then look with expectation to the next opportunity to step out in faith with Him!  I know that our resiliency has baffled and most likely frustrated a few folks in the process… but the bottom line is that we answer to God and not to man!

Our ability to take a stand of faith with the knowledge that He assures us of His truth working in our behalf, empowers our expectations of success, convinces us of our abilities to see it through, gives us the peace that He will lead us and enable us through the hard parts of the journey and strengthens our resolve that our actions will conquer any and all obstacles that will inevitably try to come between us and the prize of what we are standing in faith for.  The knowledge of all this can’t help but give us an authoritative attitude throughout our journey of faith… don’t you agree?  And the exciting part is that according to Hebrews 11:6 this kind of faith is pleasing to God.  That’s why He is accepting of us and the actions we take and is there to help us learn through the mistakes in order to empower and mature us for the next faith adventure He has for us.

I tend to get real excited when I hear things like this!  It definitely makes me want to take another faith filled journey with God as I endeavor to follow His will for my life. How about you?  Have you ever considered how authoritative your faith is?

Have a great weekend!  We’ve got mostly sunny skies forecasted for the next couple of days and I plan to make the most of it… and as I do, I’ll be asking myself… “What steps of authoritative faith am I expecting to take today?”