My Stability

I hope that everyone here in the states had a wonderful Memorial Day as we celebrated the lives of those who gave the highest sacrifice in order for us to enjoy the freedoms that we many times tend to take for granted.

I spent a good part of Saturday digging out empty boxes and throwing out the ingredients of a few others that Josh and I stacked in there from the attic on Wednesday.  Sunday was quite a bit more difficult as I began to pack up the kitchen cabinets.  I was a little unprepared for all the memories that would come rushing over me as I handled all the dishes, bowls, serving trays and the pots and pans.  It quickly dawned on me the kitchen was the center of activity for our home.  It along with the dining/family room were Piper’s domain.  I can’t tell of all the hours the whole family spent in there sharing the cooking responsibilities, telling stories, laughing, joking and even at times, dancing around the room!

So, by late afternoon, I was completely spent, physically, spiritually and mostly, emotionally.  Then as I was sitting on the floor barely attempting to fill up another box, my neighbor and her little dog appeared at our front door!  I was never so happy to see someone.  It was like a breath of heaven and I told her so!  She stayed for a short period of time and as she was leaving, I shared how hard it was for me to not be sad over all the memories that the items in the kitchen represented to me.

And with that comment, she stopped in the doorway and with a smile said, “You have to remember that all those memories are happy memories… and that is what you need to dwell on!”  Well, that comment was what I needed to hear and I told her that yes, we really had a great marriage over all those years and I don’t have much of anything to complain about!  So, from now on, I choose to dwell on the happiness of all those memories!

I was reminded of that conversation as I started my Bible study today by writing down, as I do daily, my theme scripture verse for this year.  It comes from the end of I Peter 1:8 and declares, as I personalize it, “…because I actively believe in Him, I greatly rejoice with joy inexpressible and full of glory.” (NASB)  Then I encircle in red, the words REJOICE, JOY and FULL… just as Piper did in her old NASB Bible many years ago.

While writing it down today, I felt a spark of interest at the words “greatly rejoice.”  So, I looked it up in numerous translations as well as in the original Greek.  I found it interesting that most of the older versions do not include the word “greatly” while the majority of the newer ones I have include it or other descriptive terms to define something that is more than just a little bit of joy.  Strong’s explains this type of rejoicing as “much joy, to jump for joy, to be exceedingly glad.”  Robert’s Word Pictures states that it is the “active tense” of the verb.  (Have you ever stopped to consider all the ACTIVITY that the Christian walk involves?)

I especially liked what the Bible Illustrator said.  It describes “The Christian Joy” by saying that it is: “a present joy, a great joy, our privilege, our influence over others” and that “it is our own stability!”  Those descriptions nailed it for me and seemed to perfectly explain how the JOY of the Lord worked in, through and for us during our most trying times from 2007 until Piper’s home going in 2018.

I had realized early on after our return home from Oklahoma and things began to rapidly unwind with Piper’s health, that the one negative thing (if you can call it that!) with living with a very joyful person… is that you need to keep up the levels of joy in and around them as much as possible!  I quickly ascertained that this was going to be one of my greatest responsibilities, especially as her own ability to function independently decreased.

I’ve told of the difficulty I had when I felt that the Lord had told me that I needed to begin to lessen her interactions with those close to her, who refused to or simply could not put their own feelings aside and attempt to have some joy while in her presence.  Their sadness and depression would actually suck the JOY out of her.  It was amazing to see how it physically affected her… even after a short visit. 

What I didn’t realize at first, was that staying in an attitude of Godly JOY was just as important for me as it was for her.  Looking back today, I can see that I most likely would NOT have been able to do all the various facets of what I had to do in my care for her, if I had not had His JOY keeping me focused, strong emotionally and physically and mentally astute.

And today… Well, I need it more than ever without her!  Since she has been gone, my morning wake-ups have been… Oh, shall we say… EMPTY!  But after a couple of moments of singing simple praise songs and speaking out some very familiar scriptures, the JOY begins to percolate up from inside of me and I am ready to face the day.  Every morning and as I develop it throughout the day (through reading His Word, singing praise songs, listening to Christian music and personal scripture confession), I find myself experiencing exactly what the above explanation of CHRISTIAN JOY describes. 

For me it is a vital part of my daily existence.  It truly has become “My Present Joy, My Great Joy, My Privilege, a great part of My Influence over others” and I depend upon it to be “My Own Stability!” 

How about YOU?

Have a great week, and as you do, join me in declaring that… “I am expecting my Christian Joy to be my Present Joy, my Great Joy, my Privilege, my Influence and a big part of my Stability in life.”

Another WOW!

It looks like I haven’t written an actual blog post for some time now.  With everything going on with the house prep, showing, buyer inspections and packing, I’ve had a few things on my mind, I guess!  I have been able to put out a few quickie “Piper’s Story” journal entries and will continue to do so as time permits.  But regular blog posts may be few and far between for a month or two for the time being as I prepare and move to Broken Arrow, Oklahoma.  I’ve decided to lease an apartment for six months in the same neighborhood where we lived back in 2006-2009.  This way I’ll be right back in familiar digs and hopefully the shock of a new place shouldn’t be that rough!

The six-month period will also afford me the time to settle in to the community, find the right church to plug into and just the right neighborhood to purchase a home and live!  At this point the moving van will be here on June 13^th and then we’ll be heading off to begin the next chapter of our life with family in the “Sooner State.”

It’s been a long and mountainous journey that we’ve walked on the way to where we are today.  The last thirteen years have been like none other before.  And while I don’t understand lots of it, I do continue to have that peace of God on the inside “which surpasses all understanding” and guards my “thoughts and emotions through Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 4:7 KJV/God’s Word ©)

I have learned so much over these years and feel confident that God has some kind of plan for me to be of assistance to others who may be going through the most difficult times in their lives.  It will be interesting to see what’s ahead!  Like I have repeatedly shared… especially since Piper’s heavenly move eight months ago, the biggest key to our stability throughout our roller-coaster ride has been to “Keep your eyes on Jesus, who both began and finished this race we're in” and to “study how he did it. Because he never lost sight of where he was headed…”  (Hebrews 12:2 MSG) As long as we kept our eyes on Him and the truth of His Word, we found that we were free to have an expectancy of His best working for us whether things looked positive or not.

I found myself captivated by something I recently read in John 8:31-32… and I’m taking the liberty to modernize a little here from the King James Version, “Then said Jesus to those who believe on him, If you continue in My word, then are you my disciples indeed; And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.”   What first caught my attention was the Greek definition of the word “continue.”  Strong’s says it means “to stay in a given place, state, relation or expectancy” while Thayer’s says it infers “to continue to be present.”

For us, success, peace of mind and strength was multiplied as we stayed in the PLACE and STATE of God’s Word, kept building our faith by the constant study of His Word and thereby continued to develop a strong and personal RELATIONSHIP with Him throughout the ups and downs of what we faced every single day.  Then, when you combine all those actions, we couldn’t help but to explode with EXPECTANCY toward His performing His Word on our behalf. (See: Jeremiah 1:12)

Along the way we came across those who, when push came to shove, seemed unable to continue in His Word.  Piper and I realized early on that we had the fight of our lives on our hands and quickly submitted ourselves to Him and the truth of His Word… no matter what negative symptoms we saw and experienced as time went on. (Let’s face it… as far as we were concerned, we had NO other choice!)  For some others… well, to be honest, I think that the natural circumstances tended to prevail over their faith.

In many conversations and corresponding actions, we saw the opposite to what Jesus spoke of in John 8:31-32.  We experienced people actually drawing away from us, which worked to reduce the closeness of their relationship to us and saw their expectancy in the wonders of God’s Word diminish as they tended to stay in a place and state where they allowed what they saw in the natural to guide their emotions, words and responses toward us.  In the end… they lost out on the last eight precious years of Piper’s life… and that has really saddened me. 

As Fiver and I were coming home from town the other day, I found myself praying aloud to God about all the lessons learned of late and clearly heard that small-still-voice inside of me say, “You can’t just expect people to do what is normally expected of them!”  All I could say once again was WOW! (I seem to be exclaiming that a lot lately!)  Another lesson learned!  Our experience demonstrated that the ONLY ONE who we can ALWAYS depend on to do what is expected of Him is God!  And once our dependence is firmly placed on Him, we discover that His truth will set us free!  It happened to us and I believe it will for you as well…

Have a great week!  I’m off to mow lawns, buy more boxes and then wait for our oldest son to fly in tomorrow to help me attack the storage in the attic!  Remember to continue in His Word and He’ll continue to work in and through you!  And while you’re at it, say with me… “I’m expecting GREAT things this week from God… how about you?”

One-Liners

one-lin·er

[ˈˌwən ˈlīnər]

NOUN

one-liners (plural noun)

a short joke or witty remark.

synonyms:

joke · witticism · funny remark · witty remark · jest · quip · pun · sally · pleasantry · epigram · aphorism · repartee · banter · bon mot · jibe · barb · jeer · sneer · taunt · insult · [more]

I was in the midst of doing something over the weekend and was feeling a bit lonely without Piper’s physical presence in my life, when I suddenly stopped and said aloud, “I’m having a hard time seeing myself going forward without Piper.”  And without missing a beat I heard that all familiar small still voice inside me say, “but you’ve been doing it for eight months now!”  Well that quick quip not only startled me out of my bout with self-pity but also made me laugh with understanding as I spoke out… “You know… You’re RIGHT!”

Well… that little conversation seemed to open up the door for a whole series of one-liners that the Lord spoke to me over the next couple of days!  Job 9:4 tells us that “God's wisdom is so deep, God's power so immense, who could take him on and come out in one piece?” (MSG)  I have to admit though, that these witty remarks from the Lord were far from deep but yet exactly what I needed to hear!  They reminded me of the little repartees that Piper would say to me when I said or did something funny, clumsy or just plain stupid.  She had a way to make a quick comeback that would either make me feel better, laugh or straighten myself out… and feel good about myself at the same time!

That’s how I felt the Lord talking to me over the weekend as I went room to room removing just about all the personal touches that I had displayed on the walls throughout the house.  It wasn’t the easiest job to perform as each one of those pictures or wall-hangings held special memories of experiences with Piper and the family.  To put it mildly, there were more than a few tears shed.

On Saturday evening as I was getting ready for bed, I began to think about my future in Oklahoma and I plopped down on the bed and whined: “I don’t really want to have to start all over again!” And there it was… that small still voice rose up from deep inside and plainly stated, “You’re not starting over again Jim, you’re continuing on with your life!”  Well, I’m not sure why, but that thought brought an instant measure of peace to me.

I realized that when Piper and I started out together we were just kids and through the next 48 years built a life bursting with meaningfull experiences, developed our God given gifts and talents and matured way beyond what we could have ever foreseen as those two fun-loving and goofy seventeen-year old’s!  And now, I’ve got all that in me as I continue to move forward with all the plans and purposes that the Father still has for me to complete for Him in this life!

So, that made me feel better as I face what lies ahead.  It’s not like I am starting out with an empty toolbox but one that is stuffed with many of the precise tools and gadgets that I will require in the coming years.

Then this morning while I was praying while shaving, I found myself thinking about all of those familiar scriptures that have become my best friends over the years of my Christian walk.  As I shifted gears and began to speak out those verses (without cutting myself with my five bladed Gillette razor, I might add!) it happened again!  From somewhere inside I heard that small still voice gently whispering, “You realize don’t you Jim, that the scriptures you've studied and confessed the most over all the years are the ones that have most often directly influenced your daily life.”

Well… that was one of those “Duh!” moments that made me stop in my downstroke with the razor and stuttered out, “Ye, ye, yeah… that’s right!”  And I was reminded of my morning Bible study yesterday when I got to thinking about how important it is to “activate” the Word that we put inside of our hearts.  I had written down in my notes that day that “The Word won’t work until you work the Word!” 

This morning I took a peek at the Apostle John’s first letter to his Christian brothers and sisters where he remarked “My little children, let us not love in word, neither in tongue; but in deed and in truth.” (I John 3:18 KJV)  I found it interesting that the word “word” is talking about the “logos” or the written Word of God while “tongue” describes the spoken words of someone’s native language.  So, John is telling us that its not just good enough to talk about God’s Word or even make good confessions… but that we have to DO the word with our corresponding deeds or actions of faith!

So, there you go!  I got three quick one-liner lessons that I’ve passed on to you!  Sometimes we don’t need a whole sermon to get God’s point, but a simple one-liner that takes out all the fillers and goes right to the heart of the matter… in a most encouraging manner!  I hope that you all have a great new week ahead.  I’m hoping to get my house on the market by early next week… which means that I still have a lot to do, so I might not have too many more posts this week… but I’ll be back!  In the meantime, say with me… “I am expecting to hear, speak and act on some teachable moments from my Father God this week!”

Back to the Basics... pt2

Yesterday marked eight months since my sweet wife moved on to heaven.   And as is now a daily response, I can’t help but smile and rejoice with her as I picture her totally set free from the devasting effects of the Alzheimer’s that ravaged her brain and body for many years.

When I look at myself over the last eight months, I can honestly say that I think that I am making positive progress in realizing, facing, understanding and managing the incredibly difficult array of emotions that have been bombarding me.  I can say without any doubt that I NEVER imagined that it would be this hard, nor can I say that I’ve ever faced such a horrific time in my life before!  But my faith in God and His Word stays strong and I continue to trust Him for the strength, direction and fortitude to move forward with whatever He has planned for me.

I realized a few days ago, that I am finally beginning to be able to see beyond today.  I have always been a good long-range planner and had the gift to multitask numerous events at the same time… at least until Piper’s homegoing.  For many months since then, my only vision has been for one day at a time… sometimes only one hour at a time.  But with the passage of days, a new peace and personal confidence for the future has begun to arise in me.  So, along with preparing our house for sale, I am now stretching out and have been working with the moving company and a representative of our temporary apartment home in Broken Arrow.

If I am to be completely honest with myself… I would also have to admit that I am kind of excited about what I am beginning to visualize about my new life in Oklahoma.  I was reminded in prayer yesterday while taking in the restful view surrounding our backyard, that I had been known to tell people after we had moved here that I wouldn’t be surprised if we eventually ended up in Oklahoma with the kids… and whala!  Here I go!

So… new beginnings for a mature life!  What does it all mean?  How do I go about facing this new chapter?  Well, as I’ve stated before, the Lord has recently been bringing me back to the basics of my… or I should really say, “our” faith.  Because where I stand today in my Christian walk is a direct result of the adventures in faith that Piper and I walked since practically day one of our relationship.

Over the past few weeks many of the first scriptures that really spoke to my heart as a young man at the beginnings of our Christian explorations as a couple, have been rushing into my thoughts and carry with them much of that same zeal that sparked the revival fires of Jim and Piper Berruto.  Of course, much of it started with my spunky girlfriend, like the time she and her Mom attended a Monday night meeting at a large church in our hometown that was experiencing something called “The Baptism of the Holy Spirit.”  That experience changed her life as was immediately apparent when we spoke on the phone the moment she got to her home later that evening.

And whatever she got… I WANTED!  From that time on, we dove into the wild ride of the Charismatic movement and never turned our back nor let go of the hunger that burned inside of us.  Lately I thought of one of the books that I have continually turned to for a quick rekindle since I first read it in the late 1970’s entitled “Nine O’ Clock in the Morning” by Father Dennis Bennett.  Father Bennett was a popular, well educated pastor of a large, conventional Episcopalian church in the late 1950’s.  It was located in the Los Angeles suburb of Van Nuys in southern California.  After many months of study and examination,  Father Bennett yielded to the move of God and received the Baptism of the Holy Spirit with the evidence of speaking in tongues.  In the book he tells the story of how he was forced to resign his pastorate, received national attention and was later asked to take over a failing mission church in a run-down area of Seattle, Washington.   

The rest is well documented in the chronicles of the Charismatic movement as Dennis and his church in Seattle became a center for the movement while he became a well-known speaker and teacher on the Baptism all over the world.  Father Bennett passed in 1991.  That book spoke to my heart back then and throughout the years.  My personal experience mimicked may similarities to his life, his liturgical Christian background, and how he formulated his ideas over the Pentecostal blessing that was originally experienced by the early church in the Biblical book of Acts.

Recently I was reminded that he also lost his first wife due to disease and once again, went through many of the same pains that I am currently dealing with.  So, I picked up my second… almost worn out copy… and began to read it again… with the same rekindling of those old-time fires occurring in me once more!

Yesterday and today, I felt a leading during my Bible study time to meditate on an old favorite found in Philippians 4:13 where the Apostle Paul declares: “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” (MKJV)  I can’t tell you how many times over the years that this particular statement of faith has carried me over a hurdle in life.  And in May of 2019 it still holds as strong and as true to me as it did back in the mid 1970’s!  That’s what I love about the Word of God!  It is always fresh, always powerful, and always victorious when applied to the needs in our lives!

Well, I may be facing a whole new road, with a whole new set of circumstances that I’ve never faced before… but my answer to all of these has always stayed the same!  For I can and I will continue to do ALL things through Christ who is strengthening me!  What do you say?  How about you?

Have a great weekend, and as you do, continue to say with me… “I am expecting to make it past all the hinderances that come against me today, through Christ who is strengthening me!”

Piper's Passion

I was talking to my cousin yesterday afternoon and she mentioned the article that our local newspaper had written back in the 1980’s that talked about the growing new phenomenon called “homeschooling” and how that we were one of the first families to do so in our fair city.  The article highlighted an interview with Piper as well as including pictures of her holding an infant Jeremy while teaching Josh and Jamie around the kitchen table.

I had to laugh as I recounted to her that most people… including both of our parents… looked at us like we were Martians for wanting to pursue such a crazy and unorthodox idea!  But I also went on to explain that Piper had such a strong passion and dream concerning the process that nothing nor no one was going to derail her plans of which I whole heartedly supported and encouraged.

I started thinking about the idea of “PASSION” again this morning while getting ready for the day.  And in particular… the passion that just sort of explained who my wife was!  I recalled my walk-through with the Stager engaged by our realtor who was helping me to know what to keep and what to remove from the various rooms in our home, in order to make the best presentation possible to any potential buyers.  In the living room she mentioned the idea of taking out the piano so as to give a more accurate size of the room, saying that the instrument made the room look smaller than it actually was.

Well, that idea hit an instant mis-chord (pun intended!) with me, as removing Piper’s piano would be akin to removing Piper from my life!  A conversation ensued after that of Piper’s passion for playing the piano.  Of course… once you get me started, it was hard to hold back and since the gal was a musician herself, I bragged about my wife’s classical training and how she was just as comfortable and quite proficient with the difficult classics as well as with the old hymns of the church and the modern contemporary music played in most houses of worship today.  Anyway… we came to the agreement that the piano would stay!

But Piper had a passion for a lot of things, first of all with God, then with family, with me, yes with her music as she also continued to play flute throughout the years, with homeschooling, with ministry and in many other facets of life.  Whenever she felt that the Lord had given her a directive, she plunged in whole-heartedly, without much reserve!  And I continue to readily testify how her passion, her enthusiasm and her ability to do things with excellence… without complaining… always impressed, encouraged and ministered to me!

I was reminded of Psalm 40:11 this morning as I contemplated Piper’s passion for life.  In this scripture the Psalmist declares: “Now GOD, don't hold out on me, don't hold back your PASSION. Your love and truth are all that keeps me together.” (MSG)  As I think about my wonderful wife’s passion, I can’t help but be reminded of where her passion originated.  It was simply a reflection of her heavenly Father’s passion for her!  And believe me when I say that she knew Him and of His passion like the back of her hand, because she made a point to spend a lot of time with him.

A similar example of this idea is with Piper and I as she lost the ability to audibly communicate.  I had people in the family as well as other’s that we interacted with on a regular basis suggesting that I do this or that with her, or telling me that she didn’t recognize them anymore.  But what they failed to understand is that after 40+ years of intimate relationship with her, I knew her like the back of my hand (probably better than I knew myself…) I knew what made her tick, her likes and dislikes, her feeling on most subjects and most of all… I knew her passion for life!  Therefore, even though she may not have been able to speak her thoughts, I always tended to know what she desired and needed.

Likewise, Piper knew that when the Father gave her a dream or any other directive, that He always had her back and she trusted in His Word without question or with any doubt sent her way by the negative inputs from those around her… be they family or friend.  Her passion carried her through the rough patches of life, helped her to always seem to have the right thing to tell someone in need and maybe above all… to keep a smile on her face, an inner sense of expectation and a joyful attitude in her heart.

Have you ever considered what things you are passionate about in your life?  Is there a passion in you that carries you above and beyond the daily trials and tribulations that we all face?  There have been many times since Piper’s homegoing that I have found myself crying out like the Psalmist shouting, “Now GOD, don't hold out on me, don't hold back your passion. Your love and truth are all that keeps me together.” 

His passion regularly demonstrated through His personal love and truth toward me is many times all I’ve got… but with those items… I really don’t need much more!  How about you?

Have a great rest of the week, and as you do, say with me… “I am expecting the PASSION that God has put in me to carry me through tomorrow!”